My friend who travels a lot to far flung places like Tonga and Vanuatu meets a lot of far flung people who don’t meet Singaporeans very often.
As you’d imagine, the conversation would go something like:
Where you from? Japan?
No, no. Singapore.
Ah, you speak English too.
Yes, some form of.
I met some Singaporeans before, they also speak English.
Is that right?
Yes, they said they were ‘Bishaners’.
What?
Bishaners. They live in this place called Bishan, and call themselves Bishaners, and Bishaners speak English, they said.
Oh… oh… haha… oh.. hah. I am a ‘Katongite’.
Come on, who you trying to blarf? Everybardy spiks English! Not just Bishaners and Katongites. What about the Bedoki and the Marine Paraders? The Toa Payohans and the Ang Mo Kioreans? The Eunosians and the Telok Blangans? The Bukit Batoksiders? The Yishuners? The Hougangsters?
‘Bishaner’ your backside lah!
dunno u r into crack
dunno u r into crack
helluva butt crack that one…
voyeur-lah Miyagi you…
who the hell will refer themselves as bishaners.
helluva butt crack that one…
voyeur-lah Miyagi you…
who the hell will refer themselves as bishaners.
eh that butt from last night’s makan at the food court right?
eh that butt from last night’s makan at the food court right?
hou-gangsters. terrible name. You are a Hollander, or Dutch. Not bad name.
hou-gangsters. terrible name. You are a Hollander, or Dutch. Not bad name.
Mygs, you crack me up…
Mygs, you crack me up…
aiyoh. can the west have some representation please? clementites and jurongites revolt. (bukit timah how?)
aiyoh. can the west have some representation please? clementites and jurongites revolt. (bukit timah how?)
Er, Bukit Timakan?
Er, Bukit Timakan?
tampenisians! tampites..(tempeh? tampons?)
oh well…yeh i always get kinda stumped when my Kiwi friends ask me what part of Singapore I’m from…so small, still got parts meh? aiyoh..
tampenisians! tampites..(tempeh? tampons?)
oh well…yeh i always get kinda stumped when my Kiwi friends ask me what part of Singapore I’m from…so small, still got parts meh? aiyoh..
piang..wat they call ppl from tampines, man…
piang..wat they call ppl from tampines, man…
wth! i wouldn’t call myself an Ang Mo Kiorean!
wth! i wouldn’t call myself an Ang Mo Kiorean!
Bukit Timah? Bukit TiMATs?
Simei? SiMeiMeis for the ladies. Guys dunno liao.
Bukit Timah? Bukit TiMATs?
Simei? SiMeiMeis for the ladies. Guys dunno liao.
aint do me no justice!!!
aint do me no justice!!!
OK. Sorry for the delayed announcement as requested by Gabrielle. Gabrielle would like me to state that the offending picture of the crack of dawn is not of her, and has nothing to do with her despite the fact that she has been Surf-stopped immediately after the offending picture of the crack of dawn.
OK. Sorry for the delayed announcement as requested by Gabrielle. Gabrielle would like me to state that the offending picture of the crack of dawn is not of her, and has nothing to do with her despite the fact that she has been Surf-stopped immediately after the offending picture of the crack of dawn.
apology accepted. Haha.. just complaining lah. Hope ya not angry i complain k.
apology accepted. Haha.. just complaining lah. Hope ya not angry i complain k.