Touching base

iTunes’ party shuffle is playing a copy of: Brick – Ben Folds Five – Whatever And Ever Amen, of which I have the original CD and therefore didn’t steal music.

Sometimes, some long lost acquaintances will call and say hi, saying it’s been a while since they ‘touched base’ with me. I usually say hi back, but inside, I’m saying ‘what da fuck do you mean ‘touch base’? My base is not for you to touch. Touch my base and you outrage my modesty’.

Touching base is an Americanism. You touch base with acquaintances or business contacts you wouldn’t otherwise contact. You touch base with people who are an after-thought to you at best. You touch base to assuage your guilt or absolve yourself for not keeping in contact. Touching base is superficial. Touching base usually serves no purpose unless you have a motive.

I have been naive enough to think that some people mean well when they touch base. A reasonably well-known local celebrity who is currently parading in swimwear on some Chinese serial about people parading in swimwear once touched base with me, said she missed ‘the times we had together’, got me to add her to my Friendster list, and then stopped calling me cold. As ridiculous as that sounds, that was her motive. She now has like 500+ friendsters on her Friendster list.

Another recent base toucher is another ‘celebrity’, operating out of KL, who attempted touching base because he wanted free legal advice for some business he is setting up there. Something to do with managing celebrities. You know these celebrities and their nonsense businesses. Very nonsense. And they like touching bases.

Base touchers don’t really care about what you’ve been up to and how you’ve been, unless it affects them.

Base touchers lurk everywhere. So the next time someone calls and tells you he or she is calling to touch base, he or she is likely to have recently embarked on a new career as an insurance salesperson, a telemarketer, a multi-level marketing telemarketer, or a multi-level marketing insurance sales telemarketer. Or if, like me, you used to work in the entertainment industry, she could just be an insecure starlet looking to add you to her Friendster list. Doesn’t hurt to have a bikini babe on your list, actually. Yeah. She can come touch my base any day.

Nice pics in the papers the other day. Call me. We’ll do coffee.

Tioman 2002
No, it’s not too soon to say I need another holiday.

Surf stop: Renaissance Girl: Dailies
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33 responses to “Touching base”

  1. My RSSs Mr Brown Rockson Roy Ng Stylemywords Scott Adams RSSMiyagi

  2. Mandrake Avatar

    yo, where is this place in the pic? Looks familiar.

  3. Mandrake Avatar

    yo, where is this place in the pic? Looks familiar.

  4. Re-minisce Avatar

    hey miyagi, let’s touch base. wanna do coffee? heh heh heh.

  5. Re-minisce Avatar

    hey miyagi, let’s touch base. wanna do coffee? heh heh heh.

  6. Bubblemunche Avatar

    Er…. to be frank, my acquaintances never did used the phrase ‘touch base’ in our conversations. Not ang mo enough, I think. But I guess the underlying meaning behind their calls is the same.

  7. Bubblemunche Avatar

    Er…. to be frank, my acquaintances never did used the phrase ‘touch base’ in our conversations. Not ang mo enough, I think. But I guess the underlying meaning behind their calls is the same.

  8. Kevin Avatar

    touch base? I’m too cina to understand this, izit a gay related expression by any chance? 😛

  9. Kevin Avatar

    touch base? I’m too cina to understand this, izit a gay related expression by any chance? 😛

  10. Anonymous Avatar
    Anonymous

    bwahahaha. ‘bikini babe’ is probably ‘delirious dreams’.

  11. Anonymous Avatar
    Anonymous

    bwahahaha. ‘bikini babe’ is probably ‘delirious dreams’.

  12. poezii Avatar

    Heya again 🙂

    That picture reminded me of Fiji. What are more annoying than acquaintance touch-basers – relative touchbasers, especially those who have started their own MLM businesses.

  13. poezii Avatar

    Heya again 🙂

    That picture reminded me of Fiji. What are more annoying than acquaintance touch-basers – relative touchbasers, especially those who have started their own MLM businesses.

  14. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    That picture is of Kampung Genting, Tioman.

    OK, Re-minisce, howzithangin’? let’s do coffee!

    I think ‘Touch Base’ is a sporting term, from baseball or something, which is probably why I dislike it, because I’m a cricket man. And I play it with a straight bat, and I’ll carry my bat through the innings till it’s time to pull up stumps.

    Whatever made you think it’s ‘Delirious Dreams?’ Huh? Huh? Huh?

  15. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    That picture is of Kampung Genting, Tioman.

    OK, Re-minisce, howzithangin’? let’s do coffee!

    I think ‘Touch Base’ is a sporting term, from baseball or something, which is probably why I dislike it, because I’m a cricket man. And I play it with a straight bat, and I’ll carry my bat through the innings till it’s time to pull up stumps.

    Whatever made you think it’s ‘Delirious Dreams?’ Huh? Huh? Huh?

  16. Cowboy Caleb Avatar

    so that’s what you did to make you so angry at her.

  17. Cowboy Caleb Avatar

    so that’s what you did to make you so angry at her.

  18. cour marly Avatar

    You mean people still say ‘touch base’? That’s like so early 2000s…. haha. Yeah, it does sound rather daft.

  19. cour marly Avatar

    You mean people still say ‘touch base’? That’s like so early 2000s…. haha. Yeah, it does sound rather daft.

  20. littlecartnoodles Avatar

    My guess is that “touch base” is a baseball term.

    Another Americanism that has crept up in the conversations of Singaporeans is “ball-park figure”. Also from baseball, I think.

    “What ball-park figure ? Do you even know what a ball-park is, and how big is it ? Say ‘agak-agak’ lah !”

  21. littlecartnoodles Avatar

    My guess is that “touch base” is a baseball term.

    Another Americanism that has crept up in the conversations of Singaporeans is “ball-park figure”. Also from baseball, I think.

    “What ball-park figure ? Do you even know what a ball-park is, and how big is it ? Say ‘agak-agak’ lah !”

  22. Feline Stalker Avatar

    things i discovered while reading this blog entry…

    -you listen to ben folds’ “brick” (i think its a great song)

    -you have friendster… *snigger*

    -people actually use touch base in singapore *wags finger* i am afraid of americans *hums…*

    -the parading swimwear girl is superficial! oh, but wait! …i thought everyone already knew that;)

    -you know giggly flo

    anyway i hate genting; i prefer nipah and juara. Have you been there? 🙂

  23. Feline Stalker Avatar

    things i discovered while reading this blog entry…

    -you listen to ben folds’ “brick” (i think its a great song)

    -you have friendster… *snigger*

    -people actually use touch base in singapore *wags finger* i am afraid of americans *hums…*

    -the parading swimwear girl is superficial! oh, but wait! …i thought everyone already knew that;)

    -you know giggly flo

    anyway i hate genting; i prefer nipah and juara. Have you been there? 🙂

  24. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Been to Juara, but not Nipah. Which part of the island is that? Also been to Paya, Tekek (of course), Salang, and what’s that place at the southernmost end?

  25. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Been to Juara, but not Nipah. Which part of the island is that? Also been to Paya, Tekek (of course), Salang, and what’s that place at the southernmost end?

  26. Feline Stalker Avatar

    http://www.tioman.com.my/
    http://www.mukutislandconnection.com.my/

    nipah is one of the smaller kampungs on the island. really cosy and quiet= nice. and you can do excellent snorkelling there. not much operators, so the underwater habitat is good. not a white sand beach like salang, but everything else makes up for it. you can book a place from island connections in mersing.

    southernmost? i think mukut. good for fishing and relaxing, but not much else…

    can’t think of any reason why anyone would go to tekek. i hate that place! super duper ugly 🙁 the only reason i was there, was to get to juara…

    juara… heaven 🙂

  27. Feline Stalker Avatar

    http://www.tioman.com.my/
    http://www.mukutislandconnection.com.my/

    nipah is one of the smaller kampungs on the island. really cosy and quiet= nice. and you can do excellent snorkelling there. not much operators, so the underwater habitat is good. not a white sand beach like salang, but everything else makes up for it. you can book a place from island connections in mersing.

    southernmost? i think mukut. good for fishing and relaxing, but not much else…

    can’t think of any reason why anyone would go to tekek. i hate that place! super duper ugly 🙁 the only reason i was there, was to get to juara…

    juara… heaven 🙂

  28. calm one Avatar

    If “touch base” is from baseball…
    guess what they use to touch the base?
    So if you’re the base, they’re thinking of stepping on you…

    lifeatngeeann.blogspot.com

  29. calm one Avatar

    If “touch base” is from baseball…
    guess what they use to touch the base?
    So if you’re the base, they’re thinking of stepping on you…

    lifeatngeeann.blogspot.com

  30. Re-minisce Avatar

    waitaminute – just which base are we talking about getting to here. heh heh heh.

  31. Re-minisce Avatar

    waitaminute – just which base are we talking about getting to here. heh heh heh.

  32. kyeixhin Avatar

    huh? touch base? neva heard it in baseball. i guess it’s an AMerican football term.

  33. kyeixhin Avatar

    huh? touch base? neva heard it in baseball. i guess it’s an AMerican football term.

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