Good house hunting

For the last month, I’ve had a friend who’s a housing agent helping us look for a place to rent. She’s having it tough, making appointments only for me to break them because ‘something’s come up’, and because ‘yeee, I don’t like the place’.

But like buying a car, renting an apartment is rocket science in this country. I have almost no idea what most real estate agents are talking about when they’re trying to sell the place to me. There was this one agent (not my friend – she speech okay) who spoke to me at length about the advantages of the apartment we were viewing:

“This place location good, it’s convenience and shot distance to the Emma Tee. Next tum even better. They billing the Eye Urrer.”

“The what?”

“The Eye Urrer, the gahmen going to bill the Eye Urrer? One in Marina Bay? This one will be bill in Sentosa?”

“The Eye what?”

“The Eye Urrer! Eye Urrer? You know? The Cashino?”

“Orh, the Cashino”.

“Yes! Very convenience!”

“Ah. OK.”

“Yest. Now you look insye the master buffroom, there is a bill-in Juckoogee”.

“Juckoogee?”…

Yes. A Juckoogee. How convenience.

Juckoogee
Excuse please, is Juckoogee come with the chio bu bill-in?

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12 responses to “Good house hunting”

  1. Remember, Prison Got No BroadbandTODAY: Buzz remains for hustingsThe Da Vinci TrailEh? No ban on podcasts?Calling off the huntExpensive mall alertMagic Hay Mee FundoshiSingapore Armed Forces Veterans’ League, you suck!Good house huntingPodcast: Jedi election special

  2. Ah Neh Avatar

    is there any hotel in singapore that has inbuilt jacuzzis? not common ones..but within the rooms.

  3. Ah Neh Avatar

    is there any hotel in singapore that has inbuilt jacuzzis? not common ones..but within the rooms.

  4. kormmandos Avatar

    They make you laugh first with their poor pronounciation, then make you laugh again as you part with your money. But they laugh their way to the bank. Hallmark of top performing agents…

  5. kormmandos Avatar

    They make you laugh first with their poor pronounciation, then make you laugh again as you part with your money. But they laugh their way to the bank. Hallmark of top performing agents…

  6. elsie Avatar
    elsie

    oh my. and i thought housing agents generally speak well.

  7. elsie Avatar
    elsie

    oh my. and i thought housing agents generally speak well.

  8. Michael Chua Avatar

    Wah near IR with jacuzzi? Must be very expensive right? $1k? $2k? Mr Miyagi is a very rich man 🙂

  9. Michael Chua Avatar

    Wah near IR with jacuzzi? Must be very expensive right? $1k? $2k? Mr Miyagi is a very rich man 🙂

  10. Alan Avatar
    Alan

    well, in light that you help-ed advertise for the prawn mee man…I will hepchu by giving you the contact to a-nah-der agent if you so require it….fast, efficient and england is good one, confirm you understand…. e-mail.

  11. Alan Avatar
    Alan

    well, in light that you help-ed advertise for the prawn mee man…I will hepchu by giving you the contact to a-nah-der agent if you so require it….fast, efficient and england is good one, confirm you understand…. e-mail.

  12. […] So we found a place that’s really nice – an apartment which is old enough not to be the usual low-ceiling small bedroom type of apartment. It’s got greenery, lots of it, and a dusty old lift lobby that’s seen better days. […]

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