Did the earth move for you?

“Richter Scale of Love” photo by ___Q___

Over the past year there’ve been more tremors felt in Sin­ga­pore than I remem­ber in the last decade. And there might be an expla­na­tion for this, accord­ing to a mem­ber of the Israeli Knes­set.

Shlomo Benizri MK, a mem­ber of the ultra-Orthodox Shas Party, claims that earth­quakes are caused by homo­sex­ual activ­ity.

I haven’t heard some­thing like this since Sun­day School and Bible Knowl­edge (‘O’ Lev­els) classes, where I learned about the destruc­tion of the cities of Sodom and Gomorra because their inhab­i­tants were all sex­u­ally deviant homo­sex­u­als and that’s where the Eng­lish terms Sodomy and Gon­or­rhea come from and we should never ever try it or even look at it because Lot’s wife was turned into a pil­lar of salt which is not really use­ful because you can’t build any­thing per­ma­nent with it.

I’m guess­ing it was with this knowl­edge that this par­tic­u­lar Right Hon­or­able Mem­ber of Knes­set asked his gov­ern­ment a cou­ple of days ago to stop “pass­ing leg­is­la­tion on how to encour­age homo­sex­ual activ­ity in the state of Israel, which any­way brings about earthquakes”.

Good thing we stopped this Repeal 377A non­sense, else we’d suf­fer really, really big earth­quakes, and that wouldn’t be nice, espe­cially with ris­ing prices and all.

So the next time there’s a tremor that rat­tles your chan­de­liers and top­ples your col­lectibles from your dis­play cab­i­nets, shake your fist and yell, “damn you fag­gots, stop it already! I’m really scared!”

The upside to this Shlomo she­moz­zle though, is that gay euphemisms and pick up lines will now include “seis­mic activ­ity”, and “would you like to see my Richter scale?“

Tech­no­rati Tags: earth­quakes, glbt, Shlomo Benizri, Sin­ga­pore, s377a, Israel, laws, Sodom, Gomorra, Reli­gion