O Lordy help me I can’t stop hiccupping!

Hic­cups can come on at any time, so says this arti­cle, which I was hop­ing would tell me how to stop this fit I am hav­ing now.

As I write, I am still hic­ck­ing and cup­ping. It’s gone on for the best part of the hour, and I’m afraid it might destroy any chances of a rea­son­able night’s sleep.

Still here.

I hope it doesn’t break my long-standing per­sonal best of 2 days, which hap­pened in ’91 while kayak­ing to Tioman. A long bout of sea­sick­ness related vom­it­ing trig­gered the phrenic nerve to con­vulse, and I think the body couldn’t find the ‘off’ switch. I kept hic­cup­ing till we reached Tioman, and con­tin­ued to do so for half a day after that. It was the most tir­ing phys­i­cal exer­tion I’ve ever experienced.

Loud one. Still here.

I hic­cupped till I cried then, much to the amuse­ment of my kayak­ing buddy, who found it really funny until he was kept awake by my spo­radic whoops.

God­dammit.

The other uncom­fort­able effect of hic­cup­ping is that you tend to swal­low more air than you should (assum­ing you should even be swal­low­ing any). So you bloat. And then you try to burp but while you do you hic­cup again, and that’s pretty painful on the throat.

Fuck I can’t take it anymore.

Have you tried tak­ing a busi­ness call while you’re hav­ing a rapid hic­cup­ping fit? Hope I don’t have to do that in the morning.